It's easy to lose sight of what you want, especially after the freshness of a new year starts fading and you feel like you're back in the same ol' rut you thought you had dug your way out of. And then you hop on social media only to see the people close to you chasing their dreams and accomplishing big goals. Sure, you're happy for them, but you also feel like you'll never quite get to where they're at. Then it becomes a cycle of negative thoughts leading to no action leading to more negative thoughts... Until you're left standing still.

I am so there right now.

Giving up can seem like the best option when you're stuck in a rough place... And that is okay. It's completely fine to take a few days to wallow in whatever it is your feeling. Spend a day in bed with your cat watching Netflix or an afternoon with the radio blaring while you cry in the shower – it's fine!

Eventually, though, take the time to reconnect with what you want out of life. Reassess where you're at and where you want to be, because those places can rapidly change. Make sure that what you want aligns with your highest good – not the highest good of those around you.

I was reading a post over at FemmeHead – check her out if you haven't already – and this quote was exactly what I needed to read: "We have to realize that we’re all just creating our empires in our own, unique way." This is so true. No one has been on our exact path before and no one will follow it exactly like we do. It's all unique to us, our ideas, and our experiences.

Take your time. Reconnect. Remember that your life is for you to live and lead.

Only a few months ago, I made a bold statement by saying Fuck Resolutions. Why wait until a new year to move forward on things you want to make happen? And I still wholeheartedly believe that. But I also believe in the motivation and fresh feeling that comes with a new year. I want to use that new energy to create some positive change in my life –– not resolutions, but seeds of ideas that I want to see grow in 2017. To be honest, I wasn't even going to go that far until I was struck with a bit of divine guidance at the tail end of last year when a certain word grabbed me and wouldn't let me go: courage.

As I said in my first post of 2017, I've begun a bit of a spiritual journey. That started with me making the decision to read the Bible in full by reading a small bit every day. As I worked my way through Genesis –– which, whew, was harder than I expected –– quotes kept jumping out at me. Words about letting go of fear and trusting in a higher power really resonated with me and I realized that what the God (or the Universe, Goddess, Source Power... whatever) was telling me to do was to live courageously. I've spent many years worrying about what I say and what I do, how it will affect others, what others will think of it, whether I am willing to create conflict in order to live my most authentic life... And it has left me a voiceless, anxiety-ridden mess.

This year, I am letting go of those fears and worries and using my newly found courage to plant seeds of intention. Instead of resolutions or goals with a specific outcome, I'm using words, ideas and themes to shape my year. And I'm not planting all of my seeds right now. I want to allow other ideas to form throughout the year –– as well as allow the ideas I have now to fade away if and when they no longer serve me. Here are a few of the ideas I am currently working on for 2017:

Travel. Despite a desperate desire to do so, I've not traveled much in my lifetime. My family wasn't able to take annual vacations until I was a teenager and, even then, they had to be somewhat close to home as my mom has a terrible fear of flying. I have had a severe case of wanderlust ever since I was little but haven't taken action on it. This year, I will –– and, while I'm not picky about location, I am trying to manifest a trip to NYC. Fingers crossed.

Minimalism(ish). I've talked about my minimalist aspirations on here before, so I won't go into too much detail, but I still have such a long way to go in order to live as minimally as I would like. I am still selling and donating things that I no longer need or that don't personally bring me any joy, but I am also still going out and buying new things more often than I should be. I know I'll never be a 'perfect' minimalist –– as if such a thing exists –– but I want to move ahead on this journey this year.

Zero-Waste. This kind of goes hand-in-hand with minimalism but, I believe, is even more difficult. Which is why it is just an intention and not a set goal. In my area, it is extremely hard to live waste-free. Unless you live within city limits, there is no curbside recycling and most of our recycling centers are only open during weekly business hours. And there are only a handful of places that sell items in package-free bulk –– and only food, at that. So, really, any movement forward is a big step and one that I am excited to take.

Spirituality. Again, I've covered this in a previous blog post, but it's more than just sitting down every night to read the Bible. I want to learn about other religions and ways of thinking as well as be spiritually nourished in a physical way. Yoga and meditation will be a big part of that, as will talking to others about their faith and reading books on different philosophies.

Voice. This intention is the Big One. It is the one that will help support all of the others. Finding my voice and using it is something I haven't done nearly enough in the last four or five years for a multitude of reasons –– mainly that I was afraid to. This year my focus is going to be on letting people know who I am by using my voice and speaking up about my opinions and beliefs.

Do you do resolutions or are you a little more free with how you plan your year? What would you like to see happen in 2017?

The last time I posted about my Soul Goals was in October, which is when things started feeling a bit crazy for me. My routine had gone by the wayside –– I wasn't eating right or working out regularly, I hadn't meditated in months and I was just feeling stressed out. Instead of working to fix that, I just let myself sink deeper and deeper into negative emotions and energies. That might sound like an awful thing to do and I certainly didn't do it intentionally, but it ended up being one of the best things that had happened to me in a long while.

Sometimes you have to let yourself feel what you're feeling and not fight it. I hate the saying everything happens for a reason because people usually only say it when something bad happens –– but guess what? Every once in a while, things do happen for reasons you aren't yet aware of. And that is what happened to me. Those few months of wallowing, though miserable, were like a chrysalis for me. I did a lot of thinking, feeling and reevaluating, and reemerged with a new mindset and perspective.

It is with this new mindset and perspective that I am launching headfirst into some new Soul Goals for 2017. If you're new to my Soul Goals, they are three goals that I set each month that I hope will influence my life in a positive way –– either physically, emotionally or spiritually. I would usually recap my previous goals and let you know how I did, but I'm sure you already know how those went. Besides, a new year is a new start so I'm going to start fresh with my Soul Goals.

1. Only publish content I am excited to share. This kind of goes hand-in-hand with my last two posts. I don't want to go back to inauthentic, overly scheduled, stale content that I only publish because it was on my content calendar that a post needed to go out that day. I want everything I share to have a purpose or an intention, to be something I am proud to put out into the world. Whether that is one post per week or five –– or even zero –– I think it will be more beneficial for all of us to only put out into the world what makes us feel good.

2. Keep up with bullet journaling. Last year, I attempted bullet journaling and I didn't make it very far –– no, seriously, I only made it through one week before I gave up and decided to-do lists were the way to go. I was stuck in a cycle of comparison, believing that my bullet journal could only be successful if it looked like the ones on Instagram and Pinterest. But when FemmeHead posted a video on her bullet journal, I realized how silly I had been. A bullet journal doesn't have to be perfect or look a certain way. If you create a weekly layout that doesn't work for you, fine! You can try a different one the next week... And the next one, and the next one, until you find what works for you. Right now, I am obsessed with my bullet journal and I'm hoping the lovin' lasts all month.

3. Find a daily routine that works for me. As I said, towards the end of 2016 I found that a lot of the habits and routines that I found enriching had disappeared from my days and nights. It messed with my sleep schedule, my health and just my overall happiness. So I am wanting to get some sort of routine in my life again and this month I want to focus on finding what works. Currently, that involves daily meditation and spiritual study, as well as reading and journaling. I wanted to incorporate oil pulling, but that may have to work it's way in next month.

If you've been anywhere near the blogger or entrepreneur sections of the internet in the last few years, I'm sure you've noticed the major emphasis on doing the hustle –– and, no, I'm not talking about the super hot dance craze from the 70s. Being all about your brand all the time is where it was at, and if you weren't doing it that way you were doing it wrong. Post daily; make sure your Instagram has a theme; stay connected on your social media; have a workflow schedule that you stick to without fail... Add two tablespoons of sugar and an egg white and mix until frothy. Let's be real: 2016 was awful for a lot of us... Was the constant hustle a way to keep ourselves busy and distracted?

Maybe that's a little too heavy of a theory. We're all just trying to get to where we want to be in life. But sometimes it seemed like the constant call to be at the top of our game was actually keeping us from where we wanted to be. Some of us were so busy hustling that we forgot to stop and actually enjoy the moment.

I'm happy to see that 2017 is bringing about a little change on that front. Many of my favorite bloggers and vloggers are taking a step back from the constant hustle this year, posting what they want to post when they want to post it. For a web-o-sphere that has talked so much about authenticity lately, this is the first time I feel like I'm really seeing signs of it. And it is so, so refreshing. Part of why I follow others –– their blogs, their YouTube channels, their business pages –– is because I feel a connection to them, to their aura or their spirit or whatever. Last year, it totally felt like 90% of the people I was following were the same person. Everything was bright white with marble and rose gold... And don't get me wrong, I love a bright white background and some rose gold as much as the next girl, but c'mon!

A few months ago, a friend of mine posted about how much happier she was now that she didn't focus so much on being busy. I was still in that hustle mindset and commented about how I was all about productivity over being busy. Her response was not a positive one and several of her friends agreed –– different word, same connotation. At the time, I was super offended. I mean, I'm a business owner! Productivity is good!

And it can be. But not when it is forced and scheduled and made to fit someone else's ideas.

Here's to 2017. May we all walk our own paths and focus on quality over quantity, authenticity over popularity, and chilling over hustling.

It is finally the new year.

There has been a lot of debate about whether 2016 was actually as bad as we've all made it out to be, with some anecdotes about perspective and optimism thrown into the mix. Sure, it wasn't all bad –– but, let me tell you, I sure am glad to have a fresh start.

I am a big believer in using the new year to wipe the slate clean –– in addition to washing that thing off a few times throughout the year, as well. And I'm taking full advantage of my freshly washed slate. My blog is a hobby, not a career, and real world problems have caused me to push it aside for the past few months. They are excuses you've heard before: I was busy with work; I was in a funk I couldn't pull myself out of; I had family issues I had to deal with. The last couple of months have been heavy, man, and I needed those two months to really clear my head and gain some perspective.

It sounds cliché, but sometimes it is crucial to step back from things and see if they still serve a higher purpose in your life. I'm not necessarily talking about a God purpose, or a Source Power purpose –– though if what you're doing connects with that, have at it –– but the higher purpose that is pushing you forward in your life, toward your goals a that bigger picture you have for you life. In the two months I was away, I realized I was doing a lot that didn't serve a higher purpose. The way I was doing things didn't connect with who I was, who I wanted to be. I needed to rebalance –– and to figure out just how to do that.

Cut to mid-December and I still wasn't clear on exactly what needed rebalancing in my life. Then my family got some news. It was big and it was scary, and it pushed me back into things that I had long left behind. Like God. I'm a pretty spiritual person and I definitely believe in a higher power, but God was one small part of that higher power. I still believe that, but I realized that I was pushing his branch of power away subconsciously and placing a greater focus on the Universe and Mother Nature –– and I wasn't even focusing on those that much anymore.

So I started reading the Bible every night and talking to God more often, in addition to meditating more often and spending more time in nature. And things starting to slowly fall into place, into a rhythm that I was comfortable with. I started seeing messages in the Bible and meditating on them to figure out what they mean for me and balancing all of these different facets of my spirituality. I realized, Kylie Jenner style, that I didn't have to choose just one. I just had to follow my own path and feel comfortable with that.

That was just one part of this rebalancing act. I also had to figure out if the things I was doing and saying aligned with who I wanted to be; they weren't. Despite the ways I've grown in the past year or two, I've still live in fear and worry: Will they laugh at me? Will I fail? Is this too out there? These are worries that still weight heavily on me, but now that I've recognized that, I can take the steps to push beyond those fears. 

One of those fears, sadly, had to do with this blog. I started out as a beauty blogger and I've often toyed with the idea of moving past that; I've even blogged about it before. But something–– I –– kept holding me back. I would hold back on publishing posts that I didn't think people would like or understand or, worse, would make people unfollow me. They did start out following a beauty blog, after all. And so I would take long breaks from posting, worried that I wasn't doing it right, keeping a schedule well enough, or taking photos that would astound anyone who laid eyes on them.

It was silly and it was stressing me out.

So here were are in a new year and I've decided it is time for a new start –– a fresh start. No more blogging schedule, no more preconceived notions about what a blog –– my blog –– should be. 

It's all me from here on out. Run while you still can. ;)